john316
12-24-2004, 10:44 AM
One man,one mission and no chimney....How does he get in....and be creative ;D


Heres mine.....He has "Muggsy" the elf pick the lock.


Merry Christmas everyone.

skilletosis
12-24-2004, 11:50 AM
well it's a little known fact that Santa is an evolved form of The Blob. So when there's no chimney he at will is able to revert to his former form. What's really neat about this is his bag of gifts reverts also. Then he squishes thru the the heating vents. Once in he turns back to human form and breaks out the presents. When finished he blobs out.

unshakeable15
12-24-2004, 12:04 PM
really? i thought Santa was one of the X-Men in disguise. not only can he stop time and fly, but he can go through walls as well. he never actually uses a chimney, people just thought he did because they couldn't figure out how he got inside.

terrasin
12-24-2004, 12:10 PM
That jerk put a big hole in the side of my house last year! I had to buy a couple of mean Dobermen to make sure he didn't do it again this year! Bad Santa! No milk and cookies for you! >:(

CJ

saulg
12-24-2004, 03:58 PM
Why Engineers don't believe in Santa



I. Volume: There are approximately two billion children (persons under 18) in the world. However, since Santa does not visit children of Muslim, Hindu, Jewish or Buddhist religions, this reduces the workload for Christmas night to 15% of the total, or 378 million (according to the Population Reference Bureau). At an average (census) rate of 3.5 children per house hold, that comes to 108 million homes, presuming that there is at least one good child in each.



II. Time: Santa has about 31 hours of Christmas to work with, thanks to the different time zones and the rotation of the earth, assuming he travels east to west (which seems logical). This works out to 967.7 visits per second. This is to say that for each Christian household with a good child, Santa has around 1/1000th of a second to park the sleigh, hop out, jump down the chimney, fill the stockings, distribute the remaining presents under the tree, eat whatever snacks have been left for him, get back up the chimney, jump into the sleigh and get on to the next house.



III. Speed: Assuming that each of these 108 million stops is evenly distributed around the earth (which, of course, we know to be false, but will accept for the purposes of our calculations), we are now talking about 0.78 miles per household; a total trip of 75.5 million miles, not counting bathroom stops or breaks. This means Santa's sleigh is moving at 650 miles per second --- 3,000 times the speed of sound. For purposes of comparison, the fastest man-made vehicle, the Ulysses space probe, moves at a poky 27.4 miles per second, and a conventional reindeer can run (at best) 15 miles per hour.



IV. Load: The payload of the sleigh adds another interesting element.

Assuming that each child gets nothing more than a medium sized Lego set (two pounds), the sleigh is carrying over 500 thousand tons, not counting Santa himself. On land, a conventional reindeer can pull no more than 300 pounds. Even granting that the "flying" reindeer could pull ten times the normal amount, the job can't be done with eight or even nine of them--- Santa would need 360,000 of them. This increases the payload, not counting the weight of the sleigh, another 54,000 tons, or roughly seven times the weight of the Queen Elizabeth (the ship, not the monarch).



V. Energy: 600,000 tons traveling at 650 miles per second creates enormous air resistance which would heat up the reindeer in the same fashion as a spacecraft re-entering the earth's atmosphere. The lead pair of reindeer would absorb 14.3 quintillion joules of energy per second each. In short, they would burst into flames almost instantaneously, exposing the reindeer behind them and creating deafening sonic booms in their wake. The entire reindeer team would be vaporized within 4.26 thousandths of a second, or right about the time Santa reached the fifth house on his trip.



VI. Force: Not that it matters, however, since Santa, as a result of accelerating from a dead stop to 650 m.p.s. in .001 seconds, would be subjected to centrifugal forces of 17,500 g's. A 250 pound Santa (which seems ludicrously slim) would be pinned to the back of the sleigh by 4,315,015 pounds of force, instantly crushing his bones and organs and reducing him to a quivering blob of pink goo.

Conclusion: Therefore, if Santa did exist, he is dead now.

loner_33
12-24-2004, 06:03 PM
Why I beleive in Santa:

My daddy says if you don't beleive, you don't get presents!! I WANT PRESENTS! *stomps his feet* :P

metalhack
12-24-2004, 06:16 PM
One man,one mission and no chimney....How does he get in....
Well... he gets in the way that he usually does. But there is no chimney involved... only our hearts, minds, souls, integrity, and things of the like... Santa was created to corrupt the world, and have everyone think he was saving it, just by making a few kids happy with broken toys. ...Santa has no sled... he's just Satan himself. lol Poor pagan pedophile...

strangeblueangel
12-24-2004, 07:02 PM
Actually...now that things have gotten so high-tech...he can manipulate the electrical currents in your house to carry the presents...He doesnt even need to leave his house anymore...he just sits in front of his computer and laughs evil little laughs while his slave-elves fetch him the cookies and milk from peoples houses...I dont quite know how they get in...I think that all elves must be part faery and therefore can cause mysterious things to happen...

skilltroks
12-24-2004, 07:30 PM
The answer is simple: Santa doesn't exsit! So, he won't need a chimney if he doesn't exsit.
With that over, if I did believe in that big ol jolly fat guy-wait-who said he had to be fat?-My Santa would be skinny and work out every day. OK, Santa would would be sooo skinny he could slither under the door. And he's presents...umm. Santa would first throw the presents down the chimney and then go under the door. That my fellow panheads is my story of how Santa-which I dont believe btw- would get into my house.

strangeblueangel
12-25-2004, 09:40 AM
I dont believe in santa either...its just a little fun ... ya'll peoples seriously can be party poopers sometimes...

skilletosis
12-28-2004, 12:59 PM
good grief can't we just have a little fun.. This is however "The Arcade". So on with the fun.... woohoo

buckus
12-28-2004, 01:50 PM
When I was a kidlet I always imagined him walking through the wall/front door and unlocking it.

ha.

bobbi
12-28-2004, 02:36 PM
There is a Christmas movie with Tim Allen where he has to become Santa (I forget the name of the movie) but that gives a visual of how Santa gets in houses with no chimney ;)

strangeblueangel
12-28-2004, 02:51 PM
ummm...its called The Santa Claus methinks...

unshakeable15
12-29-2004, 03:36 PM
When I was a kidlet I always imagined him walking through the wall/front door and unlocking it.

ha.
so if he could just walk through the door, why would he need to unlock it? ;)

strangeblueangel
12-29-2004, 06:13 PM
because his bag couldnt follow...:D

unshakeable15
12-29-2004, 06:27 PM
well, if his clothes could go through, i'd imagine his bag could, as long as he held on to it.

that is, unless Santa goes around nekked so he can get into houses. :o

strangeblueangel
12-29-2004, 06:31 PM
LOL...that would be a very disturbing image for a little un to see...Or anyone for that matter...

akgurl
01-04-2005, 04:23 PM
or- liek in the movie- the santa clause- he can become very skinny so he can go down those pipe things-

bobbi
01-04-2005, 04:29 PM
^Yeah...exactly ;D If he can have 'flying raindeer' he can magically fit in a little pipe on top of a house. lol

disciple
01-05-2005, 06:58 PM
That jerk put a big hole in the side of my house last year! I had to buy a couple of mean Dobermen to make sure he didn't do it again this year! Bad Santa! No milk and cookies for you! >:(

CJ
really? i thought Santa was one of the X-Men in disguise. not only can he stop time and fly, but he can go through walls as well. he never actually uses a chimney, people just thought he did because they couldn't figure out how he got inside. ROFL!!! :D


I always imagined the way they did it in [i]The Santa Clause, the aforementioned movie.

Otherwise, I imagined he stole in through the back door. Scary. :o

BlackDranzer
01-06-2005, 08:28 AM
take a moment and think about raindeer flying. You know what happens when birds fly over your car. Can you amagin what would happen to your car if a raindeer decited it had to GO while flying over your car :o

And as for santa I think he's really an x-con. He dosn't need a chimmey because he can just as easily pick the lock on the front door.

strangeblueangel
01-14-2005, 10:23 AM
Dudeness...^ would leave a dent in a car...can you imagine cleaning that up?...
Ya know he could be just like anyother man in the world...Too lazy to even bring presents at all!
His wife is actually the one that does the deliverys...he just drives the sleigh...
(I'm bored can you tell?)

Phoenix3
01-22-2005, 09:04 PM
OK now you guys are getting weird. But I have to agree with the x-con image of santa.