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amodman
03-20-2006, 10:21 PM
I've died and gone to Chuck Norris (http://www.spreadshirt.com/shop.php?sid=19781&affiliate=2252)

Bassplayer
03-21-2006, 06:40 AM
um, very, uh..... interesing. if i had the money i'd prob. get one.

Pretendeavor
03-21-2006, 07:11 AM
this chuck noris thing is so gay.

FromTheInside
03-21-2006, 07:57 AM
-[edit]- yeah, yeah I changed my post.....

riz
03-21-2006, 08:02 AM
You have to admit that some of the sayings are hilarious. One of my favorites is: 'There is no skin under Chuck Norris' beard. There is only another fist.'

(I do have to point out that "Chuck Norris' beard" is grammatically incorrect, and therefore I wouldn't buy this particular shirt on principle. :P)

Jesus_Skater
03-21-2006, 08:29 AM
I've died and gone to Chuck Norris (http://www.spreadshirt.com/shop.php?sid=19781&affiliate=2252)


hmm... yes... chuck norris... i give you all my sorrow

skynes
03-21-2006, 08:32 AM
this chuck noris thing is so gay.

Smell that? That's the scent of a hypocrite who whined about how the Emo threads got treated on the boards.

Have some respect. Some of us find the Chuck Norris jokes funny.

FromTheInside
03-21-2006, 08:49 AM
Smell that? That's the scent of a hypocrite who whined about how the Emo threads got treated on the boards.

Have some respect. Some of us find the Chuck Norris jokes funny.

sorry. . . . . . :-X

amodman
03-21-2006, 10:48 AM
You have to admit that some of the sayings are hilarious. One of my favorites is: 'There is no skin under Chuck Norris' beard. There is only another fist.'

(I do have to point out that "Chuck Norris' beard" is grammatically incorrect, and therefore I wouldn't buy this particular shirt on principle. :P)

But you see, that's the thing. They're letting make your own...you can put whtever you want on it ;).

Isildur9473
03-21-2006, 01:59 PM
I wish they would let you pick the celebrity. Nothing says "lose some weight" like giving someone a Rosie O' Donnel shirt or something like that.

not_you
03-21-2006, 02:11 PM
I wish they would let you pick the celebrity. Nothing says "lose some weight" like giving someone a Rosie O' Donnel shirt or something like that.

I know where you're coming from.

bob
03-21-2006, 02:20 PM
Was using God's name in vain really needed in the title of this thread? (Exodus 20:7).

Anyway, I find a lot of the Chuck Norris jokes funny. I suggest this flash game to those of you who do like Chuck Norris jokes:
http://www.flashportal.com/games/Chuck_Norris_Attack_of_the_Ninja.html

aliengurl7
03-21-2006, 02:22 PM
I don't get the whole chuck norris joke thing... its seems to be the thing on alot of boards.

amodman
03-21-2006, 05:13 PM
Was using God's name in vain really needed in the title of this thread? (Exodus 20:7).


1. I didn't (Names would be Yaweh [YHWH], Yaveh [YHVH], Jehovah, Yeshua, etc.).

2. I find no reason in particular for letting God know I am utterly astounded at some of the things on the internet to be wrong :P.

3. Back to topic! I'm not exactly a fan of the whole Chuck Norris craze, but that site was just hilarious! hehe

Pretendeavor
03-21-2006, 05:20 PM
Smell that? That's the scent of a hypocrite who whined about how the Emo threads got treated on the boards.

Have some respect. Some of us find the Chuck Norris jokes funny.
shut the heck up this chuck noris stuff is plain stupid.

disciple
03-21-2006, 05:23 PM
shut the heck up this chuck noris stuff is plain stupid.
1. It is, in fact, a matter of opinion. Opinion is the most useless thing in the world.


2. That was uncalled for. Please try to be polite, please.

Pretendeavor
03-21-2006, 05:28 PM
1. It is, in fact, a matter of opinion. Opinion is the most useless thing in the world.


2. That was uncalled for. Please try to be polite, please.
the crap he said was plains tupid and uncalled for

bob
03-21-2006, 06:07 PM
this chuck noris thing is so gay.
Now if I said 'Emo is so gay' you'd be all over me in 10 seconds. So come on dude, if you want people to be tolerant of you, be tolerant of other people. Also, if you despise something you don't always have to comment on the thread. If you don't have anything nice to say, don't say it.

cloroxmartini
03-21-2006, 06:38 PM
If you don't like this Chuck Norris business, then don't view the thread.

Isildur9473
03-21-2006, 08:07 PM
http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v734/Isildur9473/Reponse.jpg

skynes
03-22-2006, 12:29 AM
the crap he said was plains tupid and uncalled for

If you don't want people to flame your Emo threads, don't flame our Chuck Norris ones.



Now I'll leave you with an old proverb:

If you don't have something nice to say, shut your face before Chuck Norris fills it with his fist.

:)

Ok so I took some artistic license on that one.

weebird20
03-22-2006, 04:40 AM
righty everyone....lets keep this one on topic or we will have to say bye bye to the thread...if you have a problem with the thread...don't post here....if you think its something that could cause offense then please let a moderator know so we can deal with it...other than that....roll on with the chuck norris jokes :)

Pretendeavor
03-22-2006, 05:14 AM
There is a double chin behind Chuck Norris' beard. No wonder he doesn't shave.

skynes
03-22-2006, 05:20 AM
Chuck Norris doesn't have a chin behind his beard... Just another fist.

Pretendeavor
03-22-2006, 05:21 AM
Jesus willfully crucified himself because he had insider information that Chuck Norris was going to be around in the future. Jesus did this not in fear of Chuck Norris himself, but in fear of Chuck Norris' acting.

weebird20
03-22-2006, 05:23 AM
ummm...

When the boogeyman goes to sleep every night, he checks his closet for Chuck Norris.

Chuck Norris has already been to Mars; that's why there are no signs of life there.

PinkGoo
03-22-2006, 05:25 AM
But, but, buuutt... There IS life on Mars! :o


Okay, sorry. Back on topic. I don't know any Chuck Norris Jokes. I'm just cool that way.

Pretendeavor
03-22-2006, 05:26 AM
The only number Chuck Norris can divide by is 0, because Chuck Norris is the definition of nothing.

Pretendeavor
03-22-2006, 05:30 AM
haha

Chuck Norris listens to Fall Out Boy and cries.

skynes
03-22-2006, 05:37 AM
There is no such thing as Natural Selection: Only those species Chuck Norris deems fit to live.

disciple
03-22-2006, 07:52 AM
Chuck Norris has already been to Mars; that's why there are no signs of life there.
That one made me laugh, I don't know why.

My response to that: What about DOOM?!?! :o

alorian
03-22-2006, 06:49 PM
How's that one joke go? If you can see Chuck Norris, he can see you; if you can't see Chuck Norris, you're about to get a roundhouse kick to the head. Something like that :P

Oh, and ditto to disciple ^

bob
03-22-2006, 06:53 PM
Chuck Norris can touch MC Hammer.

pizza brain
03-22-2006, 06:57 PM
Chuck Norris can touch MC Hammer.

He can do alot more than touch Mc Hammer. Try completly destroy and dissmantle Mc.

alorian
03-22-2006, 07:03 PM
I saw a flash video...

And angels sang out / in immaculate chorus / as down from the heavens / descended Chuck Norris / And with a kick / that could shatter bones / He kicked the crotch / of Indiana Jones / who fell to the ground / writhing in pain / as Batman changed back / into Bruce Wayne / But Chuck saw through / his clever disguise / and crushed batman's head / Inbetween his thighs

:P

Isildur9473
03-22-2006, 07:04 PM
I saw a flash video...

And angels sang out / in immaculate chorus / as down from the heavens / descended Chuck Norris / And with a kick / that could shatter bones / He kicked the crotch / of Indiana Jones / who fell to the ground / writhing in pain / as Batman changed back / into Bruce Wayne / But Chuck saw through / his clever disguise / and crushed batman's head / Inbetween his thighs

:P

The problem with that, is Indiana Jones could take out Chuck Norris.

PinkGoo
03-22-2006, 07:04 PM
Errr... wow. Someone got... ehh, creative... :o

alorian
03-22-2006, 07:06 PM
Totally, Indiana Jones owns over nearly everyone. It's a funny video though :P

And yes, they did, heheh

cloroxmartini
03-22-2006, 07:08 PM
But this thread isn't about Indiana Jones is it? :P

Chuck Norris counted to infinity... twice!

pizza brain
03-22-2006, 07:09 PM
I saw a flash video...

And angels sang out / in immaculate chorus / as down from the heavens / descended Chuck Norris / And with a kick / that could shatter bones / He kicked the crotch / of Indiana Jones / who fell to the ground / writhing in pain / as Batman changed back / into Bruce Wayne / But Chuck saw through / his clever disguise / and crushed batman's head / Inbetween his thighs

:P

where did you see that?

alorian
03-22-2006, 07:11 PM
I'll pm it to ya if you want me to, there's a word that's not boards appropriate talking about Chuck Norris's cowboy posterior

Isildur9473
03-22-2006, 07:12 PM
But this thread isn't about Indiana Jones is it? :P

This thread isn't about your problem of sticking your tongue out at other people, yet you drag that in. ;)

cloroxmartini
03-22-2006, 07:13 PM
Chuck Norris sees that way it is.

bob
03-22-2006, 07:23 PM
Chuck Norris doesn't sleep, he waits.

pizza brain
03-22-2006, 07:23 PM
I'll pm it to ya if you want me to, there's a word that's not boards appropriate talking about Chuck Norris's cowboy posterior

send it please I'm as brain damged as I can get any way.

cloroxmartini
03-22-2006, 07:24 PM
When Chuck Norris does a pushup, he isn't lifting himself up, he's pushing the earth down.

bob
03-22-2006, 07:30 PM
When it rains Chuck Norris doesn't get wet. Rain gets Chuck Norris

cloroxmartini
03-22-2006, 07:37 PM
Chuck Norris can slam a revolving door.

bob
03-22-2006, 07:40 PM
Chuck Norris CAN believe it's not butter.

cloroxmartini
03-22-2006, 07:41 PM
Contrary to popular belief, America is not a democracy, it is a Chucktatorship

bob
03-22-2006, 07:43 PM
Chuck Norris ordered a Big Mac at Burger King, and got one.

cloroxmartini
03-22-2006, 07:43 PM
Chuck Norris can lead a horse to water AND make it drink.

bob
03-22-2006, 07:44 PM
There is in fact an “I” in Norris, but there is no “team”… not even close.

cloroxmartini
03-22-2006, 07:46 PM
There is no such thing as global warming. Chuck Norris was cold, so he turned the sun up.

bob
03-22-2006, 07:48 PM
Everybody loves Raymond. Except Chuck Norris.

cloroxmartini
03-22-2006, 07:49 PM
Chuck Norris is so fast, he can run around the world and punch himself in the back of the head.

bob
03-22-2006, 07:51 PM
Little Miss Muffet sat on her tuffet, until Chuck Norris roundhouse kicked her into a glacier.

cloroxmartini
03-22-2006, 07:53 PM
Chuck Norris is the reason why Waldo is hiding.

bob
03-22-2006, 07:54 PM
Chuck Norris once went skydiving, but promised never to do it again. One Grand Canyon is enough.

cloroxmartini
03-22-2006, 07:54 PM
Outer space exists because it's afraid to be on the same planet with Chuck Norris.

bob
03-22-2006, 07:55 PM
Cars were invented to have a faster way of fleeing from Chuck Norris. Not to be outdone, Chuck Norris invented the car accident.

cloroxmartini
03-22-2006, 07:56 PM
That one's great.

Chuck Norris doesn't read books. He stares them down until he gets the information he wants.

bob
03-22-2006, 07:56 PM
Chuck Norris's body temperature is 98.6 degrees... Celsius.

bob
03-22-2006, 07:59 PM
There is no Control button on Chuck Norris' computer. Chuck Norris is always in control.

cloroxmartini
03-22-2006, 08:00 PM
Chuck Norris once roundhouse kicked someone so hard that his foot broke the speed of light, went back in time, and killed Amelia Earhart while she was flying over the Pacific Ocean.

bob
03-22-2006, 08:01 PM
When Chuck Norris was born, the only person who cried was the doctor. Never slap Chuck Norris.

bob
03-22-2006, 08:04 PM
Chuck Norris can blow bubbles with beef jerky.

bob
03-22-2006, 08:07 PM
Chuck Norris ^ 0 does note equal 1.

cloroxmartini
03-22-2006, 08:07 PM
The Great Wall of China was originally created to keep Chuck Norris out. It failed miserably.

bob
03-22-2006, 08:16 PM
Mt. Rushmore was originally going to be Chuck Norris, but when they screwed up Chuck Norris roundhouse kicked it and changed it to what we now know it as. (I just made that up, I know, it sucks.)

cloroxmartini
03-22-2006, 08:17 PM
It was funny. :)

Contrary to popular belief, Chuck Norris, not the box jellyfish of northern Australia, is the most venomous creature on earth. Within 3 minutes of being bitten, a human being experiences the following symptoms: fever, blurred vision, beard rash, tightness of the jeans, and the feeling of being repeatedly kicked through a car windshield.

bob
03-22-2006, 08:20 PM
Ha ha, nice.

Chuck Norris invented gravity so it would be easier to kill. (Again, one of mine, it sucks . . .)

cloroxmartini
03-22-2006, 08:20 PM
That one was great too.

If you ask Chuck Norris what time it is, he always says, "Two seconds 'til." After you ask, "Two seconds 'til what?" he roundhouse kicks you in the face.

bob
03-22-2006, 08:23 PM
Chuck Norris only uses a gun because it wasn't fair when he threw the bullets. (Bob)

cloroxmartini
03-22-2006, 08:24 PM
Haha :D

When Chuck Norris sends in his taxes, he sends blank forms and includes only a picture of himself, crouched and ready to attack. Chuck Norris has not had to pay taxes, ever.

bob
03-22-2006, 08:27 PM
Chuck Norris shot J.R. (Bob, though someone probably made that up already.)

cloroxmartini
03-22-2006, 08:28 PM
Yeah, I've heard that one before. Good try though.

The quickest way to a man's heart is with Chuck Norris' fist.

pizza brain
03-22-2006, 08:41 PM
You know Chuck Norris is in the room when every thing suddenly goes black.

cloroxmartini
03-22-2006, 08:42 PM
Chuck Norris invented Kentucky Fried Chicken's famous secret recipe, with eleven herbs and spices. But nobody ever mentions the twelfth ingredient: Fear.

pizza brain
03-22-2006, 08:45 PM
If Chuck Norris asks you for something you you're specail.

cloroxmartini
03-22-2006, 08:46 PM
Chuck Norris can win a game of Connect Four in only three moves.

pizza brain
03-22-2006, 08:48 PM
No I saw him do it in one.

cloroxmartini
03-22-2006, 08:49 PM
I saw him do it in zero. :P

What was going through the minds of all of Chuck Norris' victims before they died? His shoe

pizza brain
03-22-2006, 08:51 PM
If Chuck Norris gives you 10 seconds to get on the floor do it in 5 or else.

cloroxmartini
03-22-2006, 08:52 PM
Haha.

Chuck Norris is the only man to ever defeat a brick wall in a game of tennis.

pizza brain
03-22-2006, 08:54 PM
and he did it with a broken raket his feet and hands tied together and blined folded

cloroxmartini
03-22-2006, 08:56 PM
Exactly

Police label anyone attacking Chuck Norris as a Code 45-11.... a suicide.

pizza brain
03-22-2006, 08:58 PM
Chuck Norris beat tetris by looking at it

cloroxmartini
03-22-2006, 08:59 PM
Chuck Norris read the Bible in 17 minutes and can recite it in 12.

pizza brain
03-22-2006, 09:01 PM
I saw Chuck Norris.......thankfully he was looking at something else.

cloroxmartini
03-22-2006, 09:06 PM
Chuck Norris has a post count of infinity.

skynes
03-23-2006, 04:45 AM
Fast food resteraunts were created cause Chuck Norris didn't want to wait.

cloroxmartini
03-23-2006, 08:17 AM
The chief export of Chuck Norris is pain.

1nonlyjen
03-23-2006, 07:53 PM
I think I need to backread

amodman
03-23-2006, 08:05 PM
My two favorites -

Chuck Norris counted to infinity...twice.

God originally wanted 10 days to create the Earth, Chuck Norris gave 'im 7. (saw someone here with that one, actually)

cloroxmartini
03-23-2006, 08:06 PM
Who ever started this stuff should be given a Nobel Peace Prize.

amodman
03-23-2006, 08:09 PM
Who ever started this stuff should be given a Nobel Peace Prize.

Though I doubt it really started there (As it took off well after), I always mentally connected the sudden popularity with the hilarious (well, at the time, anyways, heh) line from Dodgeball where Chuck Norris randomly showed up as one o' the judges to call the last match ;). The last line of the movie (After credits...or during, or something) was, F'ing (that's freaking for you kids out there!) Chuck Norris...I dunno, I laughed, lol.

cloroxmartini
03-23-2006, 08:25 PM
He is awesome I must admit.

skynes
03-24-2006, 12:26 AM
I found that dodgeball line to be hysterical. Funniest thing is that it WASNT scripted. Ben Stiller came up with it on the spot.

doormonkey
03-24-2006, 08:48 AM
Hahaha...the appearance in Dodgeball was the first time I'd ever seen Chuck Norris. I got made fun of so much for that, lol.

alorian
03-24-2006, 11:12 AM
*Makes fun of doormonkey*

*remembers Walker: Texas Ranger* :P

cloroxmartini
03-24-2006, 03:23 PM
The opening scene of the movie "Saving Private Ryan" is loosely based on games of dodgeball Chuck Norris played in second grade.

disciple
03-24-2006, 04:18 PM
Self-Defense Classes were invented by victims of Chuck Norris's crazy-eye.

pizza brain
03-24-2006, 04:44 PM
I though they all died?

disciple
03-24-2006, 04:47 PM
I was just attempting to make a bad joke, sorrrrry.

pizza brain
03-24-2006, 04:58 PM
so was I. you shrunk your sigy why did Chuck Norris make you do it?

disciple
03-24-2006, 05:07 PM
...when did I shrink it?

pizza brain
03-24-2006, 05:40 PM
The words look saller I don't know when it happened but they do.

disciple
03-24-2006, 06:06 PM
Probably your browser.


You never know, Chuck Norris might have mentioned the Internet and my siggy could have shrunk in fear.

pizza brain
03-24-2006, 06:12 PM
I woudn't be suprised

If you don't have a total gym by Chuck Norris's next birthday...... :'(

cloroxmartini
03-24-2006, 10:04 PM
Nobody doesn't like Sara Lee. Except for Chuck Norris.

pizza brain
03-25-2006, 09:49 AM
Chuck Norris expects the Spanish Inquisition.

bob
03-25-2006, 11:18 AM
There was no ice age, Chuck Norris just left his freezer open.

bob
03-25-2006, 11:20 AM
Chuck Norris pities Mr. T.

pizza brain
03-25-2006, 12:46 PM
Chuck Norris can sing 99 bottles of beer on the wall in one sentence.

Pretendeavor
03-25-2006, 12:55 PM
A 7-year-old blind boy once found Waldo before Chuck Norris.

pizza brain
03-25-2006, 12:56 PM
Chuck Norris pwns emo

Pretendeavor
03-25-2006, 12:57 PM
psssssh when hell freezes over


Chuck Norris started the "Chuck Norris Facts" in hopes of finding a new love. Upon finding out the majority of fans using the facts were guys, Chuck Norris wept with joy.

PinkGoo
03-25-2006, 12:58 PM
Chuck Norris pwns emoQuoted for truth.

Additional though: Most things do.

pizza brain
03-25-2006, 12:59 PM
Quoted for truth.

Additional though: Most things do.

emo's not that bad

Pretendeavor
03-25-2006, 01:00 PM
Quoted for truth.

Additional though: Most things do.

On January 12, 1995 Chuck Norris shaved his beard. On January 13, 1995 Chuck Norris filed a missing person claim on himself.

Pretendeavor
03-25-2006, 01:12 PM
Chuck Norris tried to copyright the copyright symbol. It was the first time the employees at the United States Patent and Trademark Office have ever laughed.

pizza brain
03-25-2006, 01:15 PM
When Chuck Norris walks into a bar it makes Brandon Happy.

pizza brain
03-25-2006, 01:25 PM
mindless people offten believe Chuck Norris is the anti-Christ

Pretendeavor
03-25-2006, 01:27 PM
Chuck Norris once completed a roundhouse kick so powerfully that all the hair from the top of his head ended up on his face. This is also the origin of his cowboy hat, a mark of shame.

Isildur9473
03-25-2006, 01:28 PM
Chuck Norris believes that discussing EMO online is a mistake.

bob
03-25-2006, 01:38 PM
Now children, behave yourselves.

Pretendeavor
03-25-2006, 01:43 PM
Chuck Norris was once spit on by a camel. Chuck Norris then broke out in anger, singing "My Humps" at the top of his lungs to regain his dignity.

Pretendeavor
03-25-2006, 01:52 PM
Chuck Norris gave a thumbs up on "Dodgeball" because he thought William Shatner was asking him out.

Pretendeavor
03-25-2006, 01:55 PM
For Chuck Norris, the roundhouse kick is not a signature move, it's just the closest he can come to his high school cheerleading days, which he misses sorely.

bob
03-25-2006, 01:58 PM
For Chuck Norris, the roundhouse kick is not a signature move, it's just the closest he can come to his high school cheerleading days, which he misses sorely.

Why are you so obsessed with jokes hinting at homosexuality?

Pretendeavor
03-25-2006, 02:00 PM
lol its the only good jokes about chuck noriss

Jack Bauer was overheard saying to Chuck Norris, "Let's get this straight: the only reason you're still conscious is because I don't wanna carry you."

disciple
03-25-2006, 03:12 PM
Jack Bauer was overheard saying to Chuck Norris, "Let's get this straight: the only reason you're still conscious is because I don't wanna carry you."
I think I could buy that, actually.

PinkGoo
03-25-2006, 03:13 PM
Why are you so obsessed with jokes hinting at homosexuality?It's pretty stupid. It's not really Panheads.org material, either.

Would you mind stopping, please?

pizza brain
03-25-2006, 04:02 PM
A vote for Chuck Norris is a vote for Chuck Norris.

theelectric3
03-25-2006, 04:46 PM
It's not really Panheads.org material, either.

Would you mind stopping, please?


agreed. let's try to keep the jokes clean, please. :) thanks.

doormonkey
03-25-2006, 09:25 PM
*cough* and lets not go into threads just to bash them *cough*
Chuck Norris CAN get breakfast a McDonalds after 10:30.

pizza brain
03-26-2006, 02:37 PM
Chuck Norris can post on ph without being a member

cloroxmartini
03-26-2006, 03:20 PM
If at first you don't succeed, you're not Chuck Norris.

pizza brain
03-26-2006, 03:33 PM
Chuck Norris challenged a top fule dragster to a race and won with a time of 3.23 unfortunetly this was an onoffical race so it wasn't entered in the record books as the worlds fastes 1/4 mile on foot.

cloroxmartini
03-26-2006, 03:34 PM
Do you know why Baskin Robbins only has 31 flavors? Because Chuck Norris doesn't like Fudge Ripple.

pizza brain
03-26-2006, 03:44 PM
did you know Chuck Norris once beat MJ Shaq and Kobe all at the same time

cloroxmartini
03-26-2006, 03:50 PM
Chuck Norris was once on Jeopardy. This show is notable in that it was the first occasion in Jeopardy history that Alex Trebek had appeared without a mustache. And a head.

PinkGoo
03-26-2006, 03:52 PM
Chuck Norris can post on ph without being a member
As a matter of fact, anyone can do that :P

cloroxmartini
03-26-2006, 03:59 PM
I've done that before.

1nonlyjen
03-26-2006, 04:03 PM
saw Chuck Norris on commercial for total gym today

cloroxmartini
03-26-2006, 04:12 PM
Yeah, he's just that awesome.

pizza brain
03-26-2006, 04:29 PM
Chuck Norris > toatal gym

cloroxmartini
03-26-2006, 04:30 PM
I was just about to say that. :P

pizza brain
03-26-2006, 04:45 PM
Chuck Norris took a 4 year college course in 4 days

cloroxmartini
03-26-2006, 04:50 PM
Everybody loves Raymond. Except Chuck Norris.

pizza brain
03-26-2006, 04:52 PM
Chuck Norris can bring down Pillar

cloroxmartini
03-26-2006, 05:28 PM
Chuck Norris beat Warcraft using a dial-up connection.

pizza brain
03-26-2006, 05:32 PM
Chuck Norris can defeat Audio A

cloroxmartini
03-26-2006, 05:34 PM
Chuck Norris knows the last digit of pi.

pizza brain
03-26-2006, 05:36 PM
Chuck Norris can beat up the Hulk

cloroxmartini
03-26-2006, 05:37 PM
When the Hulk gets mad, he turns into Chuck Norris.

pizza brain
03-26-2006, 05:38 PM
Chuck Norris can walk through the drive through

cloroxmartini
03-26-2006, 05:40 PM
For Chuck Norris, any resturaunt delivers.

pizza brain
03-26-2006, 05:45 PM
Chuck Norris can photos in 10 mins from a 1 hour photo shop

cloroxmartini
03-26-2006, 05:46 PM
He's just that awesome.

pizza brain
03-26-2006, 05:47 PM
If Chuck Norris says you're his mom than deal with it

cloroxmartini
03-26-2006, 05:51 PM
Chuck Norris doesn't ask, "Who's you daddy?" because he already knows.

Isildur9473
03-27-2006, 12:00 AM
Chuck Norris was made up by the government to control us.

skynes
03-27-2006, 12:57 AM
When Chuck Norris orders 2MB Broadband, he GETS 2MB.

disciple
03-27-2006, 11:40 AM
When Chuck Norris orders 2MB Broadband, he GETS 2MB.
I wish I could do that.

pizza brain
03-27-2006, 12:55 PM
Chuck Norris can anialate Bruce Lee and Ash from the Evil Dead movies at the same time.

disciple
03-27-2006, 01:02 PM
Chuck Norris can anialate Bruce Lee and Ash from the Evil Dead movies at the same time.
Nope. Wrong again.

pizza brain
03-27-2006, 01:04 PM
HA! you wish

bob
03-27-2006, 06:15 PM
If a tree falls in the woods, Chuck Norris hears it.

disciple
03-27-2006, 06:19 PM
HA! you wish
Bruce Lee alone can kick Chuck Norris into oblivion.

And Ash... need I say more?

bob
03-27-2006, 06:20 PM
Chuck Norris

pizza brain
03-27-2006, 06:21 PM
Chuck Norris got mad skillz.

Isildur9473
03-27-2006, 07:15 PM
Nope. Wrong again.

No he can do whatever it is that Pizza Brain suggested. What he can't do is annihilate him.

doormonkey
03-27-2006, 07:24 PM
Chuck Norris is the only person on earth immune to getting the "Llama llama duck" song stuck in his head.

disciple
03-27-2006, 07:25 PM
No he can do whatever it is that Pizza Brain suggested. What he can't do is annihilate him.
Oh, silly me. Thank you, Greg, for correcting me. I was so in the wrong. I have seen the Light.

cloroxmartini
03-27-2006, 07:48 PM
Did they merge two pages together?

disciple
03-27-2006, 07:49 PM
Two threads? No.

cloroxmartini
03-27-2006, 07:55 PM
Did they rename it?

disciple
03-27-2006, 07:57 PM
Did they rename it?
If I'm not mistaken, the author can rename it. It's been a long time since I made a thread. Otherwise, yeah, they probably did.

cloroxmartini
03-27-2006, 07:58 PM
Interesting. I didn't know that.

fryingpan
03-27-2006, 08:04 PM
chuck norris is overrated gene simmons now...

pizza brain
03-27-2006, 08:10 PM
Chuck Norris was once overheard saying to bruce lee "Who tought you to fight wimp."

cloroxmartini
03-27-2006, 08:12 PM
I've heard that too. ::]

pizza brain
03-27-2006, 08:12 PM
Where did you here it?

cloroxmartini
03-27-2006, 08:16 PM
Around the internet.

pizza brain
03-27-2006, 08:26 PM
Chuck Norris is so cool he needs 2 personalities to be the way he is

cloroxmartini
03-27-2006, 08:28 PM
He has two speeds: walk and kill.

pizza brain
03-27-2006, 08:29 PM
Chuck Norris can read a cd without a cd player

cloroxmartini
03-27-2006, 08:33 PM
Chuck Norris does not sleep, he waits.

pizza brain
03-27-2006, 08:38 PM
Chuck Norris doesn't need a toatal gym he gets buff just sitting around

cloroxmartini
03-27-2006, 08:39 PM
I wish I could do that. :(

pizza brain
03-27-2006, 08:43 PM
Chuck Norris was aloud free passage through the Berlin wall till he kicked it down.

cloroxmartini
03-27-2006, 08:44 PM
The Great Wall of China was built to keep Chuck Norris outof China. It didn't.

pizza brain
03-27-2006, 08:45 PM
Chuck Norris is why the north beat the south

cloroxmartini
03-27-2006, 08:48 PM
Chuck has nine moons, Earth is one of them.

disciple
03-27-2006, 08:48 PM
Chuck Norris is able to read the invisible sentence between the two following asterisks:

*


*

pizza brain
03-27-2006, 08:51 PM
Chuck Norris:HOW dare you say that disciple?

cloroxmartini
03-27-2006, 09:01 PM
That's just how awesome Chuck is.

1nonlyjen
03-27-2006, 09:53 PM
I have a movie where he can't shoot his gun but can throw knives and never miss

cloroxmartini
03-27-2006, 10:28 PM
That's just how awesome he is. I wish I was as awesome as Chuck Norri.

pizza brain
03-28-2006, 11:53 AM
That's just how awesome he is. I wish I was as awesome as Chuck Norri.
who is Chuck Norri?

cloroxmartini
03-28-2006, 01:22 PM
He's Chuck Norris' twin. :P

pizza brain
03-28-2006, 04:09 PM
your mom's Chuck Noriss's twin

bob
03-28-2006, 04:45 PM
When Chuck Norris says "I could eat a horse." It really means "Bring me a horse!"

pizza brain
03-28-2006, 04:48 PM
When Chuck Norris says "I could eat a horse." It really means "Bring me a horse!"
that must be when he's not feeling very hungry

john316
03-28-2006, 05:44 PM
Little known fact...I tought Chuck Norris all his shooting skills.

1nonlyjen
03-28-2006, 05:59 PM
I have suspected this all along

Isildur9473
03-28-2006, 06:33 PM
Little known fact...I tought Chuck Norris all his shooting skills.

Well, that explains why he keeps missing in Walker. ;)

1nonlyjen
03-28-2006, 06:35 PM
buwahahahaha

cloroxmartini
03-28-2006, 06:59 PM
He misses when he shoots? :o

pizza brain
03-28-2006, 07:14 PM
He misses when he shoots? :o
yes he's not perfect

cloroxmartini
03-28-2006, 07:26 PM
This is a sad, sad day. :'(

pizza brain
03-28-2006, 07:49 PM
no it's not

cloroxmartini
03-28-2006, 07:58 PM
Well it is for me!

pizza brain
03-28-2006, 08:04 PM
Chuck Norris is perfectly happy with not being perfect

cloroxmartini
03-29-2006, 04:36 PM
But he is perfect!

pizza brain
03-29-2006, 04:51 PM
Only God is perfect. Chuck Norris is not God.

cloroxmartini
03-29-2006, 04:59 PM
Yes I know. You need to learing when I'm joking. ;)

pizza brain
03-29-2006, 05:00 PM
I'll try I think

Chuck Norris is for staying far away from.......unless you have a death wish.

cloroxmartini
03-29-2006, 05:01 PM
That goes without saying.

pizza brain
03-29-2006, 05:07 PM
Chuck Norris can hurt people by looking at them

cloroxmartini
03-29-2006, 05:08 PM
Never have I know a man since Jesus who can defy the very laws of science.

pizza brain
03-29-2006, 05:12 PM
Chuck Norris can custom order at fast food places

bob
03-30-2006, 06:20 PM
Chuck Norris can post with html code on panheads.org

pizza brain
03-30-2006, 07:18 PM
Chuck Norris rocks harder than skillet

cloroxmartini
03-31-2006, 03:43 PM
No, I'd have to disagree with you there.

disciple
03-31-2006, 03:54 PM
When Chuck Norris does push-ups, he's not pushing himself up, he pushing the world away from him.

cloroxmartini
03-31-2006, 03:57 PM
Chuck Norris once worked as a weatherman for the San Diego evening news. Every night he would make the same forecast: Partly cloudy with a 75% chance of Pain.

pizza brain
03-31-2006, 04:59 PM
WOW he was alot nicer then

cloroxmartini
03-31-2006, 05:28 PM
Chuck Norris doesn't stub his toes. He accidentally destroys chairs, bedframes, and sidewalks.

Isildur9473
03-31-2006, 06:16 PM
Chuck Norris once realized that he was nowhere near as awesome as Isildur9473, then he imploded.

pizza brain
03-31-2006, 10:03 PM
true but he still pwn3s Greg

Isildur9473
03-31-2006, 10:33 PM
true but he still pwn3s Greg

Yeah, but I pwn him.

cloroxmartini
04-01-2006, 07:12 AM
People, people! You can't have it both ways.

Isildur9473
04-01-2006, 12:36 PM
Chuck Norris can't have it six ways let alone one.

pizza brain
04-01-2006, 02:01 PM
Chuck Norris can see other planets without a telescope

Isildur9473
04-01-2006, 02:53 PM
Chuck Norris has never been to New Orleans, nor New Hampshire.

pizza brain
04-01-2006, 03:11 PM
If he had he would have wiped them off the map

Isildur9473
04-01-2006, 03:25 PM
Chuck Norris doesn't know what that sound is.

pizza brain
04-01-2006, 03:57 PM
for centuries the people that went flying from one of Chuck Norris's round house kicks have been called UFOs but now that mystery has been solved thanks to Mr.Norris revealing this to the press

Isildur9473
04-01-2006, 04:08 PM
Chuck Norris was made up by the Government to control us.

disciple
04-01-2006, 04:09 PM
Chuck Norris was made up by the Government to control us.
You like to say that every few pages, don't you?

alorian
04-01-2006, 05:33 PM
Chuck Norris knows that those who don't like something, an idea, or a topic etc should stay away from it.... ;)

pizza brain
04-01-2006, 05:46 PM
Chuck Norris can get intrest free loans

Isildur9473
04-01-2006, 08:07 PM
Chuck Norris is a goblin king.

Switchblade
04-01-2006, 08:14 PM
chuck noris once ate pembrose meadows for breakfast

Isildur9473
04-01-2006, 08:14 PM
Chuck Norris is for a kitten.

Switchblade
04-01-2006, 08:15 PM
quatro blades for the ultimate shave

RKDCfan08
04-01-2006, 08:39 PM
with all this Chuck Norris talk, I'm ready to pull out Return of the Dragon... For those of you who don't know, it's a Bruce Lee movie where he kicks the spit out of Chucky, lol...Although I do find all the jokes hillarious :P